Culture

Who Said It: Morrissey, Ted Cruz, Your Mom or a New York Daily News Commenter?

Culture

Who Said It: Morrissey, Ted Cruz, Your Mom or a New York Daily News Commenter?

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With the release of Morrissey’s recent Autobiography, Texas Republican Senator Ted Cruz in the news for his role in the government shutdown, and this sad story in the New York Daily News about a teen caught shoplifting in Victoria’s Secret with a fetus in her bag, plus our continuing fascination with your mom, it’s becoming hard to keep track of what’s what anymore. Can you tell who said each of these quotes, Morrissey, Cruz, your mom, or a commenter on the New York Daily News?

1) “If more men were homosexual, there would be no wars, because homosexual men would never kill other men, whereas heterosexual men love killing other men. They even get medals for it. Women don’t go to war to kill other women.”

2) “Eat your vegetables.”

3) “A good start would be to tie the tubes of females who constantly reproduce with no means to care for the children and to sterilize the boys and men who father children with multiple women and do not raise or support them. Dry up the swamp so to speak.”

4) “I like their little burgers … I’m a big fan of eating White Castle burgers.”

5) “Twenty years from now if there is some obscure trivial pursuit question, I am confident I will be the answer.”

6) “She knew exactly what she was doing and did not give a damm…. The only help she needs is having concrete poured into her uterus and calling it a day.”

7) “You can’t help but feel that the Chinese people are a subspecies.”

8) “I’m just simply inches away from a monastery and I feel that perhaps if I wasn’t doing this that I probably would be in one … which of course is a frightening thing to dwell upon.”

9) “I think I must be, absolutely, a total sex object. In every sense of the word.”

10) “I’m a big fancy mincing drama queen who has to get his own way or else I’ll make everyone else miserable”

11) “I wish there was a way The goverment could drastically sever welfare. I mean reform it in a way were only those who truly need it get it.”

12) “I don’t think there’s been a day on this floor that I haven’t worn my argument boots. … I am not in my argument boots and I will confess, I really do feel embarrassed by that.”

13) “What I do not get is how can she live with the smell of the rotten flesh!! Disgusting and Vile!”

14) “You’re not allowed to come through customs with a tan.”

15) “Get a job”

16) “I was looking for a job and then I found a job.”

ANSWERS:

Morrissey: 1 , 7, 8, 9, 14, 16

Cruz 4, 5, 10 (probably), 12

Your Mom: 2, 3 (more or less I bet), 9, 15

New Daily News Commenter: 3, 6, 11, 13, 15