Was Jesus the Original Hipster?


Was Jesus the Original Hipster?


I’ve heard plenty of earnest arguments from people with Glenn Greenwald in their RSS feeds that Jesus would’ve been a liberal if he were alive today, what with that whole not being a giant piece of shit hatemonger thing he had going on. But what about another subspecies of liberal? Was old son the original hipster?

Apparently so, say the Catholic Diocese of Brooklyn, who’ve posted adds suggesting as much around New York City. (Gawker via AnimalNY).

Seems legit. Let’s tally things up:

Had a beard.

Loved the sound of his own voice.

Really interested in Middle Eastern politics.

Didn’t even own a TV.

Probably gay.

Pretty convincing argument. Although, in order to really be considered a hipster there are really only a few necessary requirements these days:

Be a person.

Do something that someone somewhere noticed you doing.

In that regard homeboy probably wasn’t really the original hipster, depending on your interpretation of the Bible. That honor would go to Adam, the first man, which, woh, brb gonna go write a 10k word think piece on masculinity and Adam from Girls because that connection just occurred to me a second ago.

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