Amazing America with Sarah Palin is set to debut next week on the Sportsman Channel, which I’m sure, like me, you had no idea existed until five seconds ago. In order to set the tone for the song they’ve tapped sub-butt-rock band Madison Rising, the music equivalent of a comic sans email-chain forward from your mom, who are best known for the most patriotic version of “The Star-Spangled Banner” ever.
“Red, wild and blue is our way of life,” they sing. “And we never back down to a challenge or a fight. Nature provides and God gives the rights. We’re Americans.” Never back down, unless, of course, we’re quitting our jobs as governor of Alaska because it’s too much real work, unlike farting around on TV.