Can’t grow a man bun or simply haven’t the patience for your man locks to grow that coveted bun-worthy length? Don’t! Or, if you’re dead set on sporting the douchiest hairdo available to mankind, you can now purchase a clip-on man bun via Groupon for the low, low price of $9.99… so long as there are enough douchebag wannabes also up for the purchase.
Unfortunately, there are. According to Groupon over one thousand clip-on man buns have been sold already. This is my nightmare.
And as the reasonable price indicates, these beauties are manufactured from 100% synthetic crap in a wide range of lifelike colors. It even comes with its very own cheeky, self-aware instructions:
- Comb your hair back toward the crown of your head, in a similar motion to lacquering a reclaimed-wood coffee table
- Attach the man bun to your natural hair the way the lay public attached itself to Arcade Fire
- Use bobby pins to secure the man bun, decide bobby pins are too mainstream, use antique paper clips instead
So ladies – next time you’re cruising Williamsburg, be sure to tug on those suckers and see if they’re real.