Cultural Commentator

The 21 Worst Things About Living in New York City in the Summer

Cultural Commentator

The 21 Worst Things About Living in New York City in the Summer

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Many people live in The City, which is how they refer to New York City in The City. Unlike other cities, New York City, aka The City, has crazy hot summers, which people are forced to suffer through on the sidewalks and in apartments and various places of business. Here are some of the worst things about the summer in New York City, one of the top cities in America, which is currently experiencing summer heat. (h/t Buzzfeed).

1. When your bike turns into a dumpster and it’s like…fml should’ve got a fixie

The various topnotes of the hot garbage smell...

2. No place to park your fan-mobile without getting blocked in by orange traffic cones anymore. Thanks a lot, Bloomberg.

...exacerbated by the stench coming from the street puddles that never dry, even in 90 degree weather.

Source: unit12

3. Blue circles hovering over everyone’s tits like what is this?

For ladies, the dreaded "boob sweat."

4. Way too many tourists in Midtown.

FOMO from your friends' beach Instagrams.

5. Summers in New York City in the 90s were the best tho.

Having to wash your dirty feet in the sink after wearing flip flops.

6. Who designed this park, Hitler? NOT COOL.

Going to the park since it's so nice out and realizing the whole city had the same idea.

7. Cultural appropriation is offensive on the subway.

Waiting for the subway and feeling like you are going to DIE.

Image by Michael Brown / Getty Images

8. Dudes in glasses looking at you on the subway, it’s like, creepppppyy. Just, come on, check your privilege for once.

Then getting on the one subway car without air conditioning and almost passing out against the pole.

Image by Spencer Platt / Getty Images

9. It’s hard to find a good slice of New York City pizza because of summer cheese shortages which shut down much of the restaurant business for months at a time.

The 23 Worst Things About Living In New York City In The Summer

Source: Tumblr.com

10. Stinky clouds of hot meat air wafting off the street carts from all the children who are out of school for the summer.

Stinky clouds of hot meat air wafting off the street carts.

11. Tough to find the right lighting to strike a balance between moody and clear when taking photos to let everyone know where you’re partying.

Rooftop bars are awesome, but insanely crowded.

12. Three words: Nerd dick. Two words anyway.

Having to wear next to nothing on your commute because it's SO FREAKIN' HOT...

Source: spokesman.com

13. That one lady in every office who’s all “LOL I’m a big fucking dead zombie frozen to death and my skin is blue. What do you guys want to do for lunch?

... but then freezing in the office because the AC is on the "arctic chill" setting.

14. Sentient coffee beings controlling your mind.

Iced coffee is more expensive than hot coffee.

 

15. This one guy Rick on the phone here. Fucking Rick. Always with the phone this guy.

Soooo many tourists that make the heat seem worse.

16. People be hiding your water behind fans. NOT GOOD. You need to drink that water because it’s hot out…

Either having no air conditioning at all...

17. Suicide rates climb in the summer months :(.

...or only having it in your bedroom, so the bathroom is like a sauna.

18. The dehumanizing monotony of modern architecture raises blood pressure leading to heat stroke and increasing incidences of weltschmerz.

"Is that liquid that just dripped on me rain, air conditioner condensation or pee?"

Source: mnn.com

19. Old ladies are mad at you for being young and having supple bosoms.

Not having the desire or money to go the Hamptons, but feeling weird pressure to go anyway.

Source: eleven.com.au

20. No one wants to come over to your hot apartment which means they won’t ever see the Pynchon and New Yorkers you’ve left around, artfully:

Figuring out how to buy one of these and get it to your apartment:

21. Too hot for bangs.

B.O. on the subway, in cabs, and everywhere.

But just when you think you’ve had enough of this sweaty dump a bird flies by and you think, I could fly too, I could fly right off of this lovely roof, and you do, all because it was a little humid out.

The 23 Worst Things About Living In New York City In The Summer