February 13, 2013

Sentient Realdoll Justin Bieber wasn’t very happy about his lack of a Grammy nomination, which Black Keys drummer Patrick Carney tried to put into context by saying “He’s rich, right? Grammy’s are for music, not for money. He’s making a lot of money. He should be happy, I guess” during a pre-show interview. This didn’t sit too well with his Biebness, who Tweeted:

Spicy! Very spicy. On one hand, you’ve got the Black Keys making an all too typical, “That isn’t real music, man” argument when it comes to Bieber’s songs—which, aside from being a little cloying can be counted as “music” without any doubt due to its inclusion of vocals, instruments, hooks, verses, agency, etc. On the other, you’ve got the brattiness of a teenager who thinks he deserves a Grammy for… what exactly? Being in the right place to work with a lot of talented people who know the best way to channel his bromantic charms into chart gold? Using his admittedly God-given voice to compare himself to Buzz Lightyear? Though the Grammys are essentially a joke when it comes to offering any kind of integrity-laden authoritative look at the music industry, it’s important to remember that they should be awarded after true accomplishment rather than being seen as an entitled checkmark on the list of things to do before turning 21. (Besides, Bieber knows he’s got to make a record with Carlos Santana on guitar if he wants the voters to take him seriously.)

That said, Carney should check his rockist privilege—someone else might counter that the Grammys are for bands attempting to digest their own generation, rather than previous ones. In response, he had this to say:

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