Last week, we learned about something quite problematic: Jon Hamm’s genitalia is so impressively sized that the costumers on Mad Men have had to make special dispensations to tame that sucker, so that the tight pants of the late ’60s don’t reveal all his God-given genetic advantage. As funny as it might be for you and me to joke about/marvel at someone’s giant plug, Hamm himself is less enthused about all of the attention he’s gotten. Speaking to Rolling Stone in an upcoming cover story, he actually sounds kind of hurt:
“They’re called ‘privates’ for a reason. I’m wearing pants, for fuck’s sake. Lay off. I mean, it’s not like I’m a fucking lead miner. There are harder jobs in the world. But when people feel the freedom to create Tumblr accounts about my cock, I feel like that wasn’t part of the deal … But whatever. I guess it’s better than being called out for the opposite.”
“Most of it’s tongue-in-cheek. But it is a little rude. It just speaks to a broader freedom that people feel like they have – a prurience.”
Which, sorry about that, Jon. We are part of the problem, though who isn’t? Still, the “problem” is notable enough that two competing underwear companies have offered to suit him up for life, figuring that American consumers aren’t clever enough to know that wearing their boxers won’t magically enlarge their nuts. Clearly, if Hamm doesn’t want people to talk about it then he should never press the issue ever again; alternately, he could just become a eunuch.