February 5, 2013

This update of Chicago lover-man crooner Jeremih’s “All the Time” came out a few days back, but I slept on it until now, which is probably a good thing, because I had a busy weekend and no way would I have gotten anything done with this perpetual boner I’m going to have to cart around for the rest of my life.

Originally appearing on his Late Nights with Jeremih mixtape from the fall, the slow, romantic ode to sex with you (you specifically), comes back for round two with a new verse from Lil Wayne, who slobbers all over the place like a polar bear eating, uh, ramen? and doesn’t come up for air until it’s time to clock out of his job at the pants factory for the day? Whatever, you get the idea, he’s much better at this pussy-whisperer routine than I am.

“Pussy for breakfast, that’s how I start my day,” Weezy raps. “My dick is a pen. It’s written all over her face. I put my tongue in her mouth, I make those pussy lips drool. She got that junk in the trunk, you know I like junk food. I tell her like this, ‘Life is good, your pussy better.’ But I put on that Magnum like a gold medal. And if it’s sweet then I’m a eat it til I get sugar diabetes, I’m her blood and she’s anemic, we perfect.”

Mercifully, Natasha Mosley’s contribution, “I could fuck you all the time”, remains as it was. Who said romance is dead?

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