Obama or Romney, good or evil, Minaj or Mariah. With every dumb issue of our dumb era there comes a time when you must put the dilly-dallying to rest, approach the line drawn in the sand boldly, and pick your side. Stevie Nicks, erstwhile Fleetwood Mac warbler, is rather familiar with the concept, having considered the line between crazy and bat shit crazy and hurdled over that bitch like an Olympian. Today she checked off another either/or item on her to do list, weighing in on the alleged feud between American Idol hosts Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey.
As The Daily (via Gawker) reports, the one time American Idol coach has made it known that she DGAF. “How dare this little girl!” she said, probably stroking a raven or a spiny lizard of some kind real creepy-like, just staring straight through you like you weren’t there. “If I had been Mariah I would have walked over to Nicki and strangled her to death right there.”
Strangled her all the way to death.
“I would have killed her in front of all those people and had to go to jail for it,” she said as the room cooled to an instant chill and shadows swarmed in the corners like rough beasts being birthed in agony.
All of which brings up one important question: I wonder if Minaj’s singing voice would sound any more goofily affected when she was gasping for air?