Now that world peace has finally been achieved, hunger is a thing of the past, AIDS has been cured, and every person is immortal, an actress vomiting at an Oscars after party is what counts as news these days, so here you go. On an upcoming episode of Late Night With Seth Meyers, Jennifer Lawrence told the host that she drank to the point of puking at Madonna’s post-Oscar bash last year. This is according to US Weekly, which recently replaced The New York Times, and every other newspaper in the world as Earth’s most vital news source. A twist in this developing story came when an audience member told US Weekly that “Jen said she was so drunk, she puked on the stairs at Madonna’s after-party, and Miley walked by and said something like, ‘Get it together, girl!'” The Cyrus Administration has yet to comment on these serious allegations, but until she does, tune in to CNN for 24 hour coverage.