Music

Beyonce to Make Super Bowl Halftime Show Watchable

Music

Beyonce to Make Super Bowl Halftime Show Watchable

+

This is obviously a very scientific metric, but I’m inclined to believe that the average NFL diehard doesn’t really care about the Super Bowl halftime show—the Super Bowl is a football game, first and foremost, and halftime is generally just a time to go to the bathroom and order more pizza. But the millions of non-sports fans who watch the Super Bowl demand more than by-the-numbers entertainment, which is why it’s been kind of hilarious to watch whoever’s in charge of these things bumble about while trying to find artists with a broad appeal who aren’t too embarrassing. Following the Justin Timberlake/Janet Jackson boob debacle, they’ve mostly stuck to classic rock dinosaurs and the occasionally unspeakable Black Eyed Peas performance. But for 2013’s game, an anonymous source reveals to the Associated Press that we might be getting an act to sate both teenagers, their dads, and snobby music critics everywhere, as none other than Beyoncé is set to take the stage. The announcement isn’t official, but this is the Associated Press; they’re not usually in the business of idle heresy. (Expect an official announcement on Wednesday, they say.) Bey is the greatest on her own, but can we take bets on Jay-Z and/or Destiny’s Child showing up to complete the spectacle? Maybe a cameo by little Blue Ivy, held over her head for the tuned-in hordes to behold in beer-soaked awe? It’ll be fantastic.