It wasn’t so long ago that boys didn’t cry, but you’d never know it from the legions of sad face emojis and #casual cries for help that darken up our timelines like mascara smears on a handkerchief. Drake paved the way for artists like Little Pain and Yung Lean (not to compare their styles, per se) to usher in an alternate reality of infinite sadness, riding the literal wave of tears that will be used as lube by the thousands of teenage girls who touch themselves to how miserable their pampered lives really are.
The world is indeed a sad fucking place, but probably more because Filipinos who aren’t among the 2K+ Typhoon Haiyan deaths need to beg the world’s listless Frappuccino addicts to recognize climate change, and less because last minute Baauer tix were sold out. Let’s just take a moment to ignore all the real reasons human existence is deeply disturbing, and instead briefly explore how this niche cultural microcosm known as the “sad boys movement” has positively affected the youth of today.
2013 saw the rise of the #BetaBoyz; not lames, mind you, but a softly-sniffling band of sensitive thugs who will still smoke you out and throw down with the dick, but also text you later to make sure you got home safe. Rather than wielding a classically lethal mix of repressed male anger and universally-suffered existentialism like a weapon, the #BetaBoyz of today give far fewer fucks and aren’t afraid to cry it out with you at the end of Belly 2 when The Game, in a shocking plot twist, murders his true love for snitching (spoiler alert!).
“Girls never pick the nice guy” is a patently #tiyad adage that has been around for far too long, one that paints women as incapable of recognizing our own needs and any sexually viable XY-chromosomal chuckleheads as even more incapable of recognizing them. If there’s one thing the internet can systematically do, it’s destroy binary archetypes, sexual or otherwise, and help us to realize that there are other people out there who share our predilections, which include weeping, hunching in the fetal position and ruing the day we were born.