Film & TV

Ben Affleck Announced as New Batman

Film & TV

Ben Affleck Announced as New Batman

+

Ben Affleck is set to star in the next installment of the Batman saga, when the most emo of super heroes makes an appearance in the upcoming Man of Steel sequel. In the Affleck version of the Batman origin story, however, his parents weren’t murdered, his father just went out for a pack of Mahbaros and a lahge Dunkins and came home too late for his ma to go play her numbahs, so she kicked him out and he had to drop out of Boston English and got mixed up with some colored boys from Dot without a strong male influence in the home. He coulda gone to Holy Cross like his cousin, and that’s the tragedy.

via via