January 9, 2013

The annual CES convention is in full swing in Las Vegas right now, and as usual, it’s serving as a look at the technology trends and new products that will be launched this year giving us more efficient means to integrate our lives with the internet and complete the inevitable march toward evil artificial intelligence/engender our forthcoming addiction to porn robots. That much is standard. What convention attendees probably weren’t expecting was a trip into Willy Wonka’s acid dungeon of pain. The Verge has in depth coverage of the insanity of Qualcomm’s keynote here, including appearances from Maroon 5, Big Bird, Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer, Guillermo del Toro, and, literally, and I do mean that literally literally, the most embarrassing representation of the “Born Mobile” generation you’ve ever seen. I don’t know what Qualcomm makes exactly, but I want in on some of what they’re processing, if you know what I mean there. (Drugs is what I mean).

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