It can be such a chore finding a special holiday gift for that 1%-er who has everything. Diamond bras are old news, and frankly, make for some pretty awkward eye contact when you wear it under a snug turtleneck. As one upwardly mobile reality-TV ex-Countess put it, money can’t buy you class. But this definitive list provides ideas for everyone in your rolodex at a range of prices from “If you have to ask…” to just plain ridiculously expensive. So if you won that $500 million jackpot last week, which I assume you probably did, here’s how to spend it.
FOR THE ANIMAL ENTHUSIAST
Your allergy-sufferering friend will be so thrilled to receive a furry companion from Lifestyle Pets, which claims to have the only genuine, scientifically-proven hypoallergenic cats and dogs in the world. The wallet friendly Allerga model goes for $6,950, but you’ll have more fun terrifying the mailman with the ultra-exotic Ashera, which resembles a mini-leopard, grows up to 25 pounds, and costs close to $26,000. It’s money well spent, because in addition to being hypoallergenic, Lifestyle also promises this cat is smart, affectionate, loyal, and chatty. With a pussy like that, who needs human friends? Each pet comes ready for the high life, with vaccines, a microchip implant, and an airline certified pet transporter for overseas jaunts.
If your buddy prefers his animals dead, gold-plated, and bearing faint religious undertones, this $5,500 lamb skull by Benoit Peleran for Crânatomie is the obvious choice. Available at Bergdorf Goodman, it’s the perfect reminder of what Christmas is all about.
FOR THE PLAYER:
When it comes to backgammon, London-based designer Alexandra Llewellyn doesn’t mess around. The world’s oldest game is best enjoyed on a handmade board, painted with your choice of motifs: choose from feathers, antlers, butterflies, palm trees, or vintage nudes. Antique gold and black weighted aluminum playing pieces are included, but if that’s too plebeian, kick it up a notch with custom-made mother of pearl, jasper, or rock crystal chips. Custom boards are also available, like this one, made with American black walnut and cactus wood (yes, that’s a thing), and turquoise and marble playing pieces. Got a cheater on your naughty list? Rest assured: the rose wood dice cups are lined with inside lips to ensure fair and random rolls of the precision laser-cut dice. Starting at $3,400 at Bespokeglobal.com.
FOR THE POLITICO:
For $100,000, wannabe politicos can experience the 2013 Presidential Inauguration in style through the Ritz-Carlton’s Access Washington package at the hotelier’s DC location. A deserving millionaire gets the presidential treatment from January 18-22, with first-class airfare, chauffeur service, guided tours, shopping and styling at Saks Fifth Avenue, private dinners, and nightly themed amenities. The package is priced for two, so there’s just one question: Wife or mistress?